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Nondiscrimination Policy Stirs Debate
School Board Considers Change That Would Encourage Tolerance on Sexual Orientation

Thursday, August 8, 2002; Page VA05

School Board Chairman Stuart D. Gibson (Hunter Mill) says that in his seven years on the board he has never seen an issue capture as much attention as whether board members should include sexual orientation in the school system's nondiscrimination policy.

Some board members have been getting as many as 200 e-mails a day on the issue. After hearing from speakers on both sides July 25, the board postponed a vote while the state attorney general weighs whether the policy would violate state law. The nondiscrimination policy says that the school curriculum should teach nondiscrimination and that staff members would receive training promoting tolerance and unity.

Here are excerpts from the county residents -- most of whom identify themselves as gay rights activists or as conservatives -- who testified at the board meeting:

Vincent Worthington
Middle school teacher:

For whatever reason, several students, mostly in my seventh-grade Spanish immersion course, came to the conclusion that I was gay, and by early spring had begun a systematic personal attack upon me in the classroom, finding every opportunity to say or write words such as "queer," "fag," "homo," openly questioning my sexuality and making vulgar references to sexual acts.

At first, I treated these behavior problems the same as any other, sending the students to Time Out. However, as the school year progressed, these attacks became more frequent, hostile and blatant, the boys in question became more belligerent and some of my better behaved students even jumped on the bandwagon to try to look cool in front of their friends. My personal classroom materials were defaced, effigies of me suggesting I wanted to have sex with movie stars and hippos were found in desks and notes suggesting I was gay were passed. One student was overheard to say, "God loves everyone except fags."

Though administrators were aware of these problems, I felt like nothing was being done to alleviate this toxic atmosphere. Needless to say, this situation caused me much stress, concern, frustration and rage.

I was a teacher with some level of power and authority and the situation reduced me nearly to the point of helplessness. Imagine the helplessness that gay-perceived or gay-identifying students must feel when the system implicitly or explicitly allows them to be persecuted.

The board needs a clearly defined and rigorously enforced policy on how such situations should be handled. Doing so will help to assure that such incidents will be eliminated or handled more expeditiously in the future.

Words can be powerful weapons for good or evil. We as a society have taken a stand against hateful words used against people based on their race or gender. Those words make us flinch because we as a society agree they should not be used to further hate. We also know that hateful words can sometimes result in hateful actions. Until words like "fag," "dyke," "queer," and "homo" are grouped in the same category with racial and gender slurs, we have not made schools a safe place for learning for all our children.

Kris Gulden
Former police officer:

I knew from a very young age that I was gay. Like race, sex, or national origin -- three birth traits that are included in the current nondiscrimination policy -- my orientation is a fact of my DNA.

Twenty years ago, the message I got about homosexuality was that it was wrong. It was shameful, not to be tolerated. And it was something that I could not, and cannot, change.

Being gay is not easy. Gay teenagers have a higher rate of suicide than heterosexual teenagers. Having to face the prejudice and hatred that exists required either acting like you're straight, or living honestly and subjecting yourself to ridicule and violence. The choice is not, "Should I be gay or straight?" The choice is, "Should I live a lie and be safe, or should I live honestly in fear?"

As board members, you have a responsibility to the students, teachers and citizens of Fairfax County. A nondiscrimination policy that protects some people, but not all people, is not fair. A nondiscrimination policy that includes sexual orientation is simply a promise to students and employees. It is a promise that they will not be treated differently because of their genetic composition. It is a promise that they will be protected from harassment and discrimination. It sends the message that it is perfectly acceptable for them to live, teach, learn and play in absolute harmony with what is at the core of their being. It is a statement that gays, lesbians, bisexuals and transgendered people can live honestly, openly and fearlessly.

Julie Flanagan
Springfield:

About three years ago, I began in earnest the pursuit of breaking free from homosexuality. I have come to know the stories of dozens of men and women, most of whom have left the homosexual lifestyle.

Perhaps the most important factor influencing a homosexual orientation in a child is a broken relationship with the parent of the same gender. Normally, the profound needs of a little girl for security, affection, affirmation of her gender and unconditional acceptance are met in the intimacy of a healthy mother/daughter bond. That bond never formed between my mom and me. And as I grew up, the longings in my heart to have those needs met only grew with me.

I fantasized daily about being cared for by a kind and loving soul, someone compassionate with whom it would be safe to be vulnerable. Then, quite naturally, sexual awareness began to emerge and I made a huge mistake. I connected my deep longings for motherly nurturing with sexual intimacy.

Now, I can see those false connections clearly. Now, I'm growing in the good of healthy same sex friendships. Why would a school board adopt a policy that opens the door to destructive influences on vulnerable, impressionable children? Because that is what adding "sexual orientation" will do. It will open the door wide to adults, who will mislead children into thinking that the profound needs they feel for acceptance and nurturing are really a sexual identity they were born with -- making it even harder for children to find the truth.

So I ask you to protect children from the deception and futility of homosexuality and vote against including "sexual orientation" in the nondiscrimination policy.

Stan Barton
Father of four children in Fairfax schools:

Homosexuality is not a minority issue -- it is a behavior issue. Rather than add another "protected" class of students and employees, the proper course of action is to implement and enforce a policy that says no one is harassed or discriminated against.

There are public health and economic issues with incorporating "sexual orientation" in the list of protected categories. As one of the best school systems in the country, we should be educating our youth in the principles and practices that will lead them to become healthy, productive citizens. Schools should not support, or indirectly advocate through policy change, a lifestyle that literally kills, resulting in social and economic loss to our county and nation.

Homosexuals experience vastly disproportionate percentages of serious sexually transmitted diseases due to homosexual practices. Fairfax County schools should encourage sound behavior rather than offering special protection and endorsement of a behavior that threatens individuals and public health.

Ann Rodriguez
Reston business owner:

My adult son is gay. When he came out over 12 years ago, my entire family put their arms around him and around the issue of being gay.

It is estimated that one in four families may have a gay family member. Young men and women who discover this difference in their sexual orientation are sometimes met with family, school and social discrimination that can challenge and damage their lives forever, if not end it. Our pride in our children and our efforts to protect them is the greatest gift we can give our gay and lesbian sons and daughters.

I urge understanding, compassion and social justice for our school kids who in their difficult teenage years may discover they are "different" but are not bad, sinful or damaged. They are normal and healthy and should enjoy a school life free of harassment and discrimination.

Our school system is one of the finest in the country. We should continue to be the school system that welcomes and protects all children; the school system that protects its own employees against discrimination in hiring and opportunities for advancement; the school system that honors its commitment to teach all of us that discrimination because of sexual orientation is wrong.

Michael Lennett
Father of two children in Fairfax schools:

My faith and moral values lead me to teach my children, among other things, to avoid actions that lead to risky and dangerous sexual activity. No one should be discriminated against due to skin color, ethnic origin, sex, financial condition or religion. But I have serious concerns about personal lifestyles that are immoral, dangerous and can cause "sexually transmitted diseases."

Will the schools teach impressionable children that the homosexual lifestyle is risky and dangerous? Will it teach them that they could get diseases? Will it teach them that it could wreck their appearance and turn them into a ghostly shell of the person they once were? Will it teach these children that they could even suffer a long and painful death?

There are already rules and regulations in the nondiscrimination policy that cover any kind of harassment based upon matters pertaining to sexuality. Accepting the new wording would be a tragic mistake. I plead with the School Board to not place our children in harm's way by promoting such a dangerous lifestyle.

© 2002 The Washington Post Company

Printed without permission from the Washington Post website. Read the story at the Washington Post website

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